PurpleCrap: No Peak, No Plot, No Meaning

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GTO and at 2X, do I still have to spoon-feed you?

One foine Monday, May 29,]-[ of clan Mauvecloud wrote:

I know one should not find fault with people just because of their age, but when people try inflicting bimbo-ness on you, sometimes you just don't know which of the two attitudes to adopt:
(1) Congratulations to me, I have arrived (so says the bulk of useless junk mails inviting me to pay good money to attend all those little high-power tupperware gatherings). Even the beta and gamma males are practising being bimbo and blonde on me! (By the way, I object to bimbo being classified as a female attribute. It's just a weapon of the cute and shrewd.) It is sad that at 30 I have to be teaching people how to ~~stalk~~ Google for pertinent links to conferences and journals, and not always those of *my* field too.
(2) One word to self: Sucker.

And thank you Sary-chan. Ex-strangers from strange lands can sometimes help you put things in perspective in a way that is elegant while being gentle and frank at the same time. So I finally found the words, succinct and diplomatic, with the emoticon as an extra: "...has nothing to do with me aside from the fact that I was born there and I still hold its citizenship =P"

So, on to the topic. (Because I finished reading Volume 25 yesterday and what is elgay for but inflicting your opinions on Manga X or Guy Y or Girl Z on the poor, poor Unreal People?)

All the girls we love in GTO
Onizuka Eikichi, 22, may be the linchpin holding everyone and everything together (sometimes literally) in GTO, but as I progressed towards Volume 20-ish, the realization hit that it is the girls that are keeping the readers coming back for more. All the women in GTO are interesting, all multi-faceted and multi-angsted and ah, very three-dimensional (maybe except for the Token Flat Girl, Fuyutsuki Azusa, also [Main] Love Interest - is it sort of an iron-cast editorial rule: amount of lechery possessed by male character: inversely proportional to: bra/cup size of love interest?).

Let us begin with Sakurai. Chairman of the board who also mans the cafetaria(?) as a hobby, she was the one who took in Onizuka despite objections from the all-male administrative staff. Near the end, we get a hint of Great Teacher Sakurai in action.

Double-D Daimon: Scary, scary power hag. Wasted years plotting vengeance just because she missed Great Teacher Sakurai in action at the critical moment.

Kanzaki Urumi (Kanzaki the Younger): Child prodigy, IQ of two average persons combined (reminds me of that Protoss chap from Starcraft, hehe).
Angsts: "OMG! My father is frozen, my mother plays the stock market all day just to send me to the MIT, and one of my eyes ain't the same color. Also, Miyabi hurts me as much as it does when I do my nightly (diagonal) cutting." People, can you say "malice" in Engrish?

Aizawa Miyabi: Princess of the up-and-coming upper-middle class respectability.
Angsts: "OMG! My father is faithless, my mother pretends we are one big happy while playing her own tit-for-tat game at the same time, and OMGOMGOMG! I framed my attention-whoring homeroom teacher for sexual harassment." To be meticulously correct and hence a wanky old fart, I must add that both Miyabi and Ougi were whoring each other's attention at the time. The difference is that Ougi, already having a fiancee, was just looking for a safe, cheap thrill (have this sexy 14-year make eyes at you but eating her home-made lunch was as far as you'd go for her - that kind of safe, y'know), while Miyabi invested all the seriousness of the budding teen into the 'affair'. So in a way, Ougi deserved what was coming.

Nomura Tomoko: Typical rag-to-,er,-rag story. Daughter of ramen restaurant owner making good as the rising star of buxomy cellphone advertisements.
Angsts: "Miyabi won't talk to me."
Just kidding. It is NOT possible to angst when you have a 40D chest, and more importantly, a simple left brain. On a side note, I read somewhere that people with higher IQ, when interviewed at an older age (say 55 or above), tend to summarize their lives as being less happy than people with lower (than average) IQ. So it makes sense. You can only be either smart or happy, but not both. I don't have much of a choice, so I'll take happy ^^ (or do I? *sighs*)

Kanzaki the Elder: Work-at-home stock-broker. Being an ethical woman, she actually purchased, instead of stealing, the genetic material necessary to make Urumi. See also Kanzaki Urumi.
H's note to self: This is not the way to go! As a first step towards manufacturing Mauvecloud the Younger, I would interview the donor, at least. Get all his records, medical, education, police, etc. Also a certificate testifying to his Beng-ness. As a friend once said, must not dilute the thick Hokkien lineage. Heee heee.

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Which brings us to:

All the teachers we remember from high school
As the text in the cut says, yawnery, but I should put this down somewhere before the memory goes. This was brought to you by the questions posed at the end of GTO. Something like: "What does school mean to you?" or "What do teachers mean to you?" sort of mawkish, cliched sentimental thingie.

School was just a place to show my face at, so that sufficient attendance was recorded. On days which were neither mock nor real exam days people did not expect mauvecloud to parade her exalted visage there, for she would be busy at home studying. On her own.

Does this mean that teachers suck?

No, by any means.

These clowns who perform before the class, with the blackboard as the background, the chalk in hand (and occassionally, the duster) their only weapon against the uncaring, unappreciative, and sometimes violent audience - they are necessary. Students do need them, else how could the profession survive all the apathy and the jeering and the abuse? There are only two types of students for whom teachers don't make a difference: The very ~~smart~~ kiasu, and the garbage (i.e., Onizuka and all your Bengs destined to hawk illegal DVDs on the streets). Scum of all sorts floats to the top anyway, so no helping hand needed there!

Still, there are some whom I remember, and not with a bit of fondness in my hardened heart too.

1) Mr. Sembang Kuat (can always be translated as Mr. Talkcock or Bullshit): History teacher. Labelled TAR (not the college) a playboy. "Then, Tunku spent so and so many years in England before he got his admittance into the Bar because he buaya-ed all the Englishwomen there all the time, hah!" Made the Japanese invasion (1942? 43?) of Malaya sound interesting. Of course, the state of the artillery did help his joke. By the way, the guns could have been turned around, but the point would have been moot, 'coz they were made to fire at ships, not bicycles ^^

2) Mrs. Hiao (translation: Mrs. Horny): Inggeris Teacher. Now let's see. There was this time of the year when the fad was to seat all girls in the front half of the class and the others in the back half. Needless to say, from her we got the first and only instance where a teacher stood right in the middle of the class for the whole time, talking to the others while we girls were left either staring blankly at the blackboard or risking a crick in our young, tender, developing necks trying to steal a look at her ample bottom. I don't need to name her race, yeah. Only a certain kind of people were taught to, and would condescend to, denigrate her own sex that way. (I heard she was the boss at home, though.)

3) Mrs. Old Fart (she's not old. She's just windy): Maths Teacher. Armed with heart-melting earnest sincerity which charmed even mauvecloud the apathetic kiasu student. Of course the subject helped. And she would just look into everyone, yes, everyone's eyes as she expounded on the final derivation of this formula, or drove home the point why P should be here along this side of the y-axis and not that side. She was great. Great. Sad thing is, a visit to her house for a student party (she was homeroom teach) confirmed rumors: She was not great when it came to not being a doormat. But nobody is perfect, yeah! So just leave me the good memories. A few years ago my youngest sibling informed me how Mrs. Old Fart once embarassed her by remisniscing about ~~the old legend~~ her elder sibling to the whole class. "The student who listened to you with all her heart, all the time!" Sorry, Mrs. Yeoh. I was doing History homework under my desk at the time. Your homework? I always did them two lessons in advance.

// mauve signed off @ 6:56 PM

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